Just when I think, "Oh, it's not so bad. You only have two semesters of undergrad left and things have gotten off to a pretty good start. No assholes yet..."
Then, there's Math 105. Math 105, the class I'm PISSED OFF I have to take in the first place, not only because I have math phobia (even fractions make me nervous), not only because I scored something like an 11 on the math section of the ACT and am flying blind, but mostly because it's a 100-level course, and 100-level courses mean...YOU GUESSED IT: Assholes.
My instructor is this tiny little Chinese woman who is really sweet and clearly knows her stuff. However, her accent is so thick it is very hard to understand her. There are two jerk-offs in the back of the class who have talked during lecture before, but today, were out of control. They chattered all through Dr. X's instruction, and one of them was even poking fun of her (she didn't seem to realize this or perhaps she just didn't care) while she was explaining one of the problems on the board. Now, I'll admit, she does say/do funny things from time to time (writing "deceasing" on the board instead of "decreasing" did give me a giggle), but audibly making fun of someone's language barrier is NOT cool. Anyway, these two douche bags wouldn't be quiet, so I spoke up:
"I apologize, Dr. X," I said, turning to them. "Could you guys please be quiet? I can't hear her talk."
The reply from one of them was this:
"Shut up."
I was fucking flabbergasted.
"That's really offensive," I replied. "Could you just respect the instructor, since she's the one teaching this stuff?"
"Why don't you just shut up?" he said again, never fully turning his face toward me, but glowering from the side.
Dr. X turned around and just sort of stared at them.
"I can't believe this, Dr. X," I said to her. "These guys are behaving like they're in junior high," I commented.
"Well, maybe I am," Asshole 1 replied. GREAT response. Very creative. By this point, he had all my attention. Asshole 2 was probably just grinning like an idiot.
"Apparently, you should be," I said, and turned around. I was shaking all through the rest of class.
Dr. X tried to smooth things over, saying something about not talking while she's talking, but if I was her, I would have kicked their asses out of class--not only for for disrespecting me (the instructor), but for being TOTALLY out of line with a fellow student, as well.
Dr. X loves for students to read the problems she provides on her handouts, and although I had planned to say nothing else during the remainder of class time, she stood there and waited so long for someone to offer to read one of the examples, I finally started reading it. Of course, these guys started talking AGAIN while I was speaking, and one of them even went to the trouble to knock his book off his desk, which made a loud clap on the floor. Wow, I haven't encountered this much direct hostility at school since those horrible Lord of the Flies years better known as high school.
I am an ASSHOLE MAGNET. I don't know why this is, but I can go anywhere where two or more are gathered, and almost always, the bully of the group (read: insecure jerk, male or female) will target me. I have no idea why.
Someone at work--to whom I was relaying this story--said, "Well, you're just an outspoken woman, and he couldn't handle that." Perhaps so, but this goes beyond some sort of sexist thing. This is a human decency thing. I called someone out on their rude behavior and instead of being embarrassed and ceasing the behavior, the response was to say "shut up"? This sort of stuff shouldn't happen in college. But then again, neither should audible conversations during movies, obscenities yelled from a car at someone walking down the sidewalk, or a million other rude, inexcusable behaviors I encounter daily--which confirms my belief that decorum is dead, common decency is in the shit can and we're all headed to Hades in a hand cart.
So, let's all gather 'round, punch each other in the face while singing Kumbaya and then "Shut up," 'cause I guess everything else is just a waste of time.
6 comments:
Ah the joys of assholery. Thanks to Dan Savage for that wonderful word. I'm with you in thinking that a portion of students in college these days are sucking up perfectly good oxygen and wasting someone's money in being there. I think you should go find a nice switch of river cane and at the next class meeting use it to swat them across the face. I say river cane because it is as close to bamboo as you can find growing naturally in this country and has many of the same characteristics, namely that it bretty much takes a piece of sharpened steel to break it once dried. I'm not really condoning violence but this child, if he can be called that, obviously is in need of some discipline and this would be an appropriate way to instill some in him.
wow...rude, stupid AND cowardly...nice combo boys!
I would have been shaking too...that sort of thing really, REALLY gets to me. Being rude when someone has been rude to you is one thing...but these guys really should have been booted out of the class.
If it continues, take it up with a department head...you're there to learn...and if they aren't (clearly they aren't) then they shouldn't be there.
Feel better!
Man, I need to have you guys just following me around during the course of my day, defending my principles for me! I really appreciate the thoughts (and the suggestions).
River cane? I'll certainly get good fantasy mileage out of that. Ah, what a nice whack across his simian face would have done for my state of mind...and department head? Now there's an awesome idea. I'll certainly keep it in my arsenal (hmm...arsenal is just too close to arsehole for me to ignore; quite an appropriate term, now that I think about it) if these guys decide to up the ante. I have a feeling they will be too cowardly to try anything else, but it always pays to have a plan.
Many hugs to both of you. :)
P.S. I love Dan Savage. Once, before he became the fabulous international superstar he is now, and belonged to us simple folk from Seattle, I had a dream one night that he was my BFF, who was always in drag.
I've taken to listening to the Savage Lovecast during my lunch break. My one guilty pleasure that is about to run out since I only have 24 episodes to listen to to have heard them all. I have to listen either with a earbuds plugged into my computer speakers or hope nobody comes into the office during lunch since I just stream it to my computer instead of downloading it. I'm pretty sure he is just a litttle too liberal for my very conservative office and I don't want to offend anyone.
No problem Alexandra. I'll admit, I've been guilty of 'talking in class' in my time...but if it became clear I was a distraction, OR if someone asked me to be quiet, I can't imagine I would have ever said anything other than 'I'm sorry.' Just the fact that they told YOU to shut up...that's just low class idiocy if you ask me...and a clear sign they have little to no respect for other people.
If you can, find another seat, and if they continue to peck away at you, then I'd ask for guidance from a department head. My guess is they may strike the odd bad look or something...but they'll probably be skipping class and flunking out by November anyway...
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